Sunday, June 10, 2007

Superkids & my kid

Shown on Channel 8 : Superkids 4, which talks about children who are multi-linguistic.
This show came at the right time, as I needed to speak my mind out about my feelings.

1) 5 year old girl
Parents are local and chinese, but she speaks and read Japanese as well.
Girl has innate interest in reading since she was young and until now, she can sit on her own to read says her mother. Girl's mother is a SAHM who can sit down to read for her and she listens. Can even read those children encylopedia to her girl.

Her mother said this statement "many people believe that children should enjoy their childhood, but this is the time to input things into them." I fully agree with her.

2) Boy is of mixed parentage
Father's French mother's Singaporean chinese. Boy can speak 3 languages well, apart from some Malay and Cantonese. I believe she should be a SAHM as well.
Boy listens to the French storys daddy reads to him.

Now, my point is......
1) why are their children so obedient? And my girl likes to play so much?
2) read to her only to have her getting figgety after awhile. No prize for guessing, those bedtime storybooks are still a virgin - haven't opened up the books. She's more interested in short stories. If ask her to read to me, she can't do it until I point word for word for her, and she reads to me. Then it seems that she's not enjoying her reading, coz' her tone of voice sounded as if I'm gruelling her.
3) The children are so smart (that's why they are on Superkids4), and here I am getting Athena to do her assesment books is like bringing her into the torture chamber.
4) she complaint to dua-gu (my brother) that "everyday I got work to do, where got time to watch."
5) I get misunderstood as a mad mother who only likes to torture her kids coz' it did seems that Athena has no play at home. But it's always her dilly dallying her time, I told my brother who really thought I don't let her play or watch TV.
Ask my girl, do I let her watch Mr Bean while she's having dinner? I needed to save time so let her do 2 things at one time.
Ask my girl, do I buy toys for her to play or is it solely books for her?
Ask my girl, do I pull her out from school at every school holiday to bring her out for play.
Ask my girl, do I let her play her toys, computer games, watch TV when there's sufficient time?
Did she mention all these to my family?? No!!
I want her to watch her DVDs, she has a few she hasn't watched. But every weekend, we have not enough time. She naps and that's it, no more time.

6) I get the tsk tsk from my family, who says things that points to the hints "poor thing... she wants to come here to play.... poor thing, still a child". Well, Iggy is still small so they don't feel any pressure. I bet they'll change their statement once he's older.

7) I want to spend time with my children, which is why sometimes I either bring them out; or do things together eg. cookies, crafts. If I can't be bothered, I'd let her run amok at home after school everyday. You know I've got better things to do, I could have done my own reading; leave them aside and just let my children grow up to what they want to be, mix with wrong company and I don't care.

8) Brother said she's too afraid of me "i want to play with di-di, later my mummy come very early to bring me home....." their hearts all melted; they sympathized with her for being born to a mad mummy.
Said it's good to be afraid of me, but she's too afraid of me...which is no good.
So how? What am I going to do? Loosen the rein when already my hubby never take active participation with the kids. Someone needs to be the disciplinarian, and it has to be me. So... my daughters will both hate me for being the devil in the family. They will probably not understand my intention until they're both mothers themselves (but that is if they do self-reflection in the first place). Let's just say they both are finally appreciative of what I did, would I still be around by then?

9) I wonder will it be better if I put her in those half day school, and then the rests of the day I can use it to send her for enrichment classes? Then it won't be seen as my girl has no weekend off and she can play during the evenings for all I care.

10) I worry for Athena, who's so ah-nia. Can't draw, can't swim, can't this can't that. Next time how? Perhaps I should just pull her out from both English S&D and art class and put her in Morris Allen where they include writing. Heck! Anyway, it did seem to my family that I have been drilling too much academic things into my girl so might as well put her in there. Mental arithmetic is next!

11) whole life worry about Athena, I hope Aricia don't need me to worry so much for her. I hope Aricia don't need me to consistently push her. If Aricia is the same as Athena, I say I'm damn suay to have 2 kids like that. If Aricia is the same as Athena, I honestly think I won't live long..

12) You know the chinese song 世上只有妈妈好, makes me think am I a good mother; am I doing right with my child?
I try to be a good mother, but a mother who's caught in the middle myself, the mother who wants to nuture my older girl (who seems to only want to play) in a strict manner but worry if she'll go crazy or rebel. If only my girl has half of those 2 children's "can sit down" I'll be thankful.

It's not easy being a parent. Don't you agree with me?

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