Another strong fighter

After the big news of Emma Yong's battle with C, I flipped the obituaries page. I was shocked to see another lady smiling back at me.

Evelyn, a lady whom I do not know personally but I did drop her an email once and she took time to reply me. At that time I thought it was so nice of her to do that cos' she was probably busy with more important matters and trying to spend as much time with her own family.

As what V, Carol's husband told me they had encountered - countless calls while wife trying to rest. They can't fault them afterall they were showing concern. (Carol and V is a couple I chatted up with in a Jap restaurant when I brought my girls for lunch one day after school. And they told me about Carol's illness. Immediately I felt a tinge of sadness and anger " what is going on in this world now. Seems like everyone around has cancer!" Of course I could only relate a little to them as I then had a surviving strong fighter SIL. It was after a few weeks later when I met her husband, who told me Carol wanted me to have this book she wrote. Only then did I realize she even wrote her book (and here I am only writing rubbish in my blog - shameful right?) The book is priceless!

Back to Evelyn. I didn't know they came back to Singapore until one day I thought I saw Evelyn walking to school. I asked che-che if N and S were back in school? She said yes. I was surprised coz' she did tell me they were in Beijing but thought maybe home is still better. I'll probably suffer if I were to stay there long too! Pollution and food.

And it so happened a few nights ago che-che was telling me about N (who is in the same Chinese class as her) didn't do her homework and teacher asked her about it. My reaction was "How the teacher responded?" She said she accepted her reasoning and I thought so too coz' their Chinese teacher is very understanding and nice lady. But never did I expect that the poor children have to deal with her sudden departure at this timing - SA1. I cried when I saw her picture, I never thought I would cry but I did.

And now that I've read this article, it made me cry even more and think about my SIL.

When I look at the picture of the girls and their daddy looking at mummy, it pains me. Rest in peace, Evelyn.

It's nearly over

Finally! The study room is looking a little tidier. A little only!

Somehow still must have some books outside to make it look like a studyroom.

One more paper tomorrow and it's F-R-E-E-D-O-M until the school holiday starts. Been a bad period for me too! When my long forgotten tension headache came back to visit me. I used to have tension headache when I'm preparing for exams, the doctor even asked me "who's sitting for exams? Your daughter or you?" I answered him without batting my eyelids "Me!"
It's really tiring to be a parent now where there has been debates and the yearly complains over our education system - which I can safely say - It will never change.
Makes me think too, if I panic over every exams she goes through, I wonder what will become of me when she's sitting for her PSLE in two years' time. Popping Ponstan every single day. And please, make that viscious cycle twice for me. Any more kids for me? No thank you.

Flying into UAE / Saudi Arabia

I forgot to post this draft out which was left inside for 2 months. *gasp*

During the LJ trip, at the mosque, I asked the guide to highlight to the class about the Mecca direction in hotel rooms' ceiling.

In the car, I started recollecting the flights I did during Ramadan period. Most times they were insignificant as it was a small group of passengers fasting. Then again, when came to them (esp ladies) we couldn't assume they were not eating right (get complaints from pax otherwise)so had to politely ask them. Thankfully, they were polite in their replies.

One significant flight where I flew into Saudi Arabia. Only a small number ate, and when I realized that I'll have problem sticking DND(Do Not Disturb) stickers (I'll run short of stickers in no time) So I sticker stickers on those who ate. Smart right? And helped in packing up some biscuits and dates for those who didn't eat. And gave out to them. Well....problem was landing time was dusk time. Didn't want them to go hungry .... But hey! That's what made SQ girls different from other airlines right?

And there was another flight when all passengers came to ask us the direction. Oh my! The flight route do change leh! Nonetheless we helped them, but too bad lor .. If they prayer and suddenly changed direction. We had passengers standing at all doors praying. Thank goodness, we had tolerant non-muslims pax sitting at the emergency exits pardon them for laying down their mats and praying. It was quite .. messy!

Forever in my heart

It's been 2 months since my SIL left us and I can't help but keep thinking about her.

Though it was a time bomb illness, I wasn't prepared for that - - *ding* sudden emptiness in me when I heard the news 2 months ago. And all I can say is "I will definitely remember it coz' it's my wedding anniversary day."

My SIL, whom I've grown closer through the years, was like a sister to me. She was only 5 years older than me and we do exchange SMSes now and then and chat easily when we meet.

Back to the first time I bump into her when I was paktor-ing with my then boyfriend. We bump into her family while walking around Bugis. It was quite funny since she was the first person of his family I met, haven't even met his mom yet. And she was so friendly, I remember the two young boys with her, who's now all grown and (ahem.. taller than me). Then over the next 4 years while we were dating, we drop by her home quite often as she stayed relatively close to me.

When she knew of the horrible C that has struck her breast years back, I tried to be there for her via SMS. I must admit I wasn't there most of the time until last year when her illness got worst. And she confided in me her greatest fear. It pains me to hear that as I'm also a mother myself. The children put up a brave front.

This year's CNY was low-key for us. We didn't do any visitation and we even spent our CNY visiting my SIL in the hospital. We had no idea how many more days she can live as she was getting weaker with each passing day. I was really glad too that I mustered my courage in telling her 'I love her' at the hospital bed, she looked at me and I stroked her head. It's strange isn't it? The three words which I can easily say out to my hubby and kids; I had to find the courage to do it with her.

At her funeral, I was so emotional, I can sit down and suddenly tear when I think of her. It's so weird to see her lying there. She's so beautiful. She is peaceful and no longer suffering. It's good for her but it's not good for the many other hearts she had to break mourning for her. I remember on the morning of the final wake, her hubby, stood by her side and playback a love song on his phone. I cried. A few times I had to walk out of the room, my heart ached and tearducts couldn't stop flowing. I never even cried so much for my FIL.

Che-che would sit down quietly and then suddenly talk about her aunty. She fondly remembers her favourite aunty feeding her and 'making cupcake rice' for her during our family holiday. My dear SIL even helped us take care of her during mealtimes, so that hubby and me can take care of that naughty mei-mei.

And though I felt the pain, I had to make sure that my girl, a 9 yr-old, can handle what is death. Afterall, our family had been dealt with 2 deaths in the family within a span of 8 months. I didn't let the children see her when we went to the parlour, I'm not sure if they would be frightened. Afterall, they didn't see their grandfather whose coffin was all covered up and I think they can't remember their great-grandma's face also. (I remember my mother flipped when I brought my kids to my grandma's funeral and let them see her. I thought it would be fine to see our loved one and mom nagged at me. And when mei-mei had febrile fits after that she thought it was something to do with the nether world and even sought the advice of a medium. Only to be chided by him halfway through her explanation that great grandma wouldn't harm her own great-grandchild.) My che-che was rather timid after FIL's funeral, will blog about that later, scared of ghosts etc.. so she didn't object.

But somehow on the second day, she asked me if she could see her aunty for one last time. She asked me if she's scary like in those movies, I told her her aunty is beautiful (Ps. The embalmer did a really good job.) and I will follow her. But there's no need to hide coz' she looks just like before. She was really brave and looked at her aunty. Somehow I was pleased that she did what she wanted to do coz' there'll be no chance after that and thought what the heck if I get scolding from mom about showing children my SIL face. Then my girl was so curious to ask me what they did to make her look so beautiful and why is there a pearl in her mouth. It was like a biology class explaining to her the process of embalming. Suddenly it dawned upon me that my girl is growing up.

Now I occasionally look at her mobile number, I didn't want to delete it. Next to her name I wrote "Forever in my heart"

Disney On Ice

Went for our Disney On Ice show again. It was ... spectacular! I'm a child once again.

The girls had so much fun!

Easter Egg Hunting

Had bro over and the kids did their Easter egg hunting around the small house 

Funny to see kids running around screaming when they find one egg, and the other child scream for having one egg less

Some of the places where we hid the eggs. Trying hard to camouflage the eggs. The best place to hide was the study room, which was even more messy as we were doing work inside.

Mei-mei's loot. She had to eat this hard-boiled egg too!

Her forfeit - hula hoop. Easy Peasy!

2 eggs missing! Guess where?

Mei-mei outraging the modesty of her uncle

Mei-mei collected all these. She received 3 sheets of stickers, pencils, Moshi Monsters figurines & cards and Playmobil figurine

Che-che's loot

Her forfeit - skipping rope & telling story (where duagu, mei-mei and Iggy had to act out the story).

Another part of Che-che's loot

Iggy's eggs. First Easter Hunt for him.

Exams! It's that time again!

Arhh!! I hate this time of the year. As I always tell my girls, every year's exams is crucial. Even small little tests - nope the daily work is crucial too.

I'm not sure whether it was the reverse method I used last year that made her perform better or she "grew up". I'm going to try the reverse method on her again this time round. At the same time, introduce some essential oils in their study room. (time to stock up on chicken essence too!)

I extracted this article from : http://www.anniesremedy.com

Memory & Focus:Herbs Using Herbs For: Concentration/Memory/Focus Herbal Remedies for Concentration/Memory/Focus Herbs Used for Concentration/Memory/Focus Basil Essential oil For: Mental Clarity, Focus Oil of Basil is an excellent, indeed perhaps the best, aromatic nerve tonic. It clears the head, relieves intellectual fatigue, and gives the mind strength and clarity. 23 Black Pepper For: Mental Focus, Headache In homeopathic practice black pepper is used for difficulty in concentrating, heavy headache, and a sad, apprehensive state of mind. 23 Brahmi For: Alzheimer's disease, attention deficit disorder (ADD), memory problems, and Parkinson's disease Brahmi is useful in treating a variety of conditions that involve impaired mental capacity, Alzheimer's disease, attention deficit disorder (ADD), memory problems, and Parkinson's disease. Laboratory studies indicate that brahmi improves intellectual function primarily by balancing the chemicals gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) and glutamate in the brain. 52 Club Moss For: Alzheimer's Although it is used primarily to treat the early symptoms of Alzheimer's, many people are taking it to improve memory and enhance mental alertness. 36 Dandelion leaves For: Alzheimer's disease The leaves provide vitamins A and C, the flowers are one of the best sources of lecthin, a nutrient that elevates the brains acetylcholine and may play a role in stemming Alzheimer's disease. 27 Eleuthero For: Concentration and focus Eleuthero boosts concentration and focus without the letdown than comes from stimulants like caffeine. Ginko Biloba For: Brain Function The phytochemicals unique to the ginkgo tree restore better blood flow to the brain, allowing improved use of oxygen, and protect the cells from free radicals 27 Ginseng For: Boost mood, improve memory Ginseng may boost mood, improve memory and attention, lengthen physical and mental endurance, improve test scores, and ease anxiety. Although the exact mechanisms of activity are not known, it is likely that ginseng protects a portion of the brain known as the hippocampus from the effects of stress hormones. This prevents memory problems, a common complaint among people under stress. This mechanism would also explain the usefulness of ginseng in preventing loss of memory and cognitive ability in people who suffer from bipolar disorder, depression, and a disorder of the adrenal glands known as Cushing's disease. 27 Gotu Kola For: Memory, concentration Research has also demonstrated the beneficial effect of Gotu Kola, Centella asiatica, on memory, concentration and mental performance levels Horsebalm (Mondara) For: Memory The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved tacrine hydrochloride (Cognex), a medication that reportedly slows progression of the Alzheimer's disease by preserving acetylcholine in the brain. Horsebalm (Monarda, various species), contains the beneficial compound carvacrol, which helps prevent the breakdown of acetylcholine. Horsebalm also contains thymol, which also prevents the breakdown of acetylcholine. 27 Peppermint essential oil For: Mental clarity Cooling and refreshing peppermint energizes the mind and mood, helping to improve mental clarity and memory Periwinkle For: Mental Aging, Dementia The health benefits of vincamine and related compounds, which are sold as drugs in Europe, relate to the treatment of primary degenerative and vascular dementia. As a dietary supplement, vincamine is promoted as a nootropic. The effects of aging are generally chronic, raising concerns about the safety of long-term use of vincamine in its targeted population.. . Vincamine article at NIH.gov. (), Yerba mate For: Increasing concentration Mate has the effect of stimulating the mind, increasing concentration and easing depressive moods, while not interfering with sleep like coffee may.

It's here!

Can't believe this! Che-Che brought home the form for me. It's the application form for Primary 1 registration.

Lil' one was so happy to know she's one step closer to being in the same school as Che-Che. However I'm not sure how Che-Che would feel if her sister is the trouble maker in school and she gets labelled as "So you're Aricia's elder sister?" I was the shadow of my naughty sister, of course in my case - teachers were puzzled that I was so guai after they were terrorized by the elder one.

Late in updates

Pardon me for this lacking update. In the first place, i think nobody follows my blog now.

Been really busy (with the kids) and it'll only get more busier in 3 months time when I'm helper-less.

Though relief that I'll have one person less to take care of, the responsibility has been lifted off from me - but I'm laden with extras other domestic responsibilities. I know I will survive, I know we all have to adapt to changes. But I'm not sure whether I'll survive through the next 5 months. Yah, my main worry now is for this year. It will be better once the lil' one starts P1.

I asked KZ quite some time back, she said she would want to go back home. I never asked her anymore, so a month back I bought her her tickets. And her response was "so fast?" What did she mean by that? Fast as in my efficiency or fast as in - she was hoping I'd ask again and she gets to stay longer? In my point of view I found it pointless to keep her if her 'heart wasn't here anymore' it'll only give her the impression that she's indispensable and her attitude would only get worse. Don't get me wrong, on the whole she's still isn't as bad as other helpers. But I noticed some slack jobs here and there.

The girls will have to learn to be independent. I'm not sure if I'll order tingkat. Sometimes I want to be the 贤妻良母 and the goody wife and cook. But .... time wasted and only if my girl can be left to do work unsupervised, I'll gladly do so.

I think so far, the lil' one is more enthusiastic about the whole thing. She volunteers to wash the dishes, sweep the floor, mop the floor, wash clothes. She has helped 1 or 2 of her plastic plates before. And .... I have to dry the cabinet exterior and floor after her. More jobs for me!! And I can't fault her or discourage her.

ADHD Vs Autism

There is this girl who was very naughty in che-che's class when she was P1. Over the years, she seems to have tone down on her naughty behaviour. But what brought my interest to this subject : ADHD Vs Autism is that some mummies would say that she is autistic. But in my opinion she wasn't, I told them that she could possibly be ADHD. And mind you, most ADHD people are smart!!

So now, I've extracted this article from : http://www.differencebetween.net/science/health/difference-between-adhd-and-autism/

ADHD Vs Autism

Basically, ADHD (completely known as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is when a person indulges in too much activity to the point that he can no longer focus his attention to a given object or task under normal circumstances. There is a recurrent feature of being impulsive, aside from the common inattention to other things. Impulsive and inattention are two of the most identifiable characteristics of ADHD.

Because these individuals are unable to focus on one task for a prolonged period of time, you’ll almost always notice them shifting tasks and frequently moving about. They really can’t stay in a single place for a long time or else they will become anxious or get bored. Nevertheless, you need not worry that much because if ever your child has ADHD, there’s still a big probability of him outgrowing the condition most especially when he reach the age of twenty and above.

Autism is when a person has poor or underdeveloped social skills. In this regard, the autistic person is not able to clearly interpret or distinguish body language. He is also unable to emphatize with other people. These characteristics are said to be attributed to the absence of mirror neurons in the central nervous system.

Autism is a more complex developmental disorder that affects many developmental dimensions of the individual. When at 3 years old, the child demonstrates certain significant restrictions in communication, interaction and behavior (repetitive) then most likely he is autistic. Sometimes autism surfaces at one year old and other cases even manifest early at birth (although you can’t conclude directly that it is autistic behavior unless there are several tests done). Because there are many dimensions and other variables to be considered, autism is usually very difficult to diagnose.

Read more: Difference Between ADHD and Autism | Difference Between | ADHD vs Autism http://www.differencebetween.net/science/health/difference-between-adhd-and-autism/#ixzz1mufuhCym

Autistic children have a hard time developing language. Even if they have already learned some new words, there’s still a big chance of losing such knowledge as time passes by. Autistic children practice a sense of ‘social retreat.’ This means that they are mostly introverted and don’t want to interact with other kids even at playtime. Most of them don’t even want to make eye contact at all. They also have sensory issues like when they identify certain stimuli as addictive (e.g. rotating fan blades). They also do repetitive motions like hand flapping.

It is also interesting to note that many autistic kids are found to have high IQs. Although they have this much mental capacity, they actually have built a ‘world’ of their own which is difficult to penetrate from the outside.

All in all, although both conditions are classified as developmental disorders they still differ in the following aspects:
1. Autism is a more complex problem compared to ADHD.
2. Autism has hallmark characteristics of repetitive behavior, language and sensory problems, and social retreat. ADHD is seen when the individual is impulsive, hyperactive, inattentive and easily gets bored.

Read more: Difference Between ADHD and Autism | Difference Between | ADHD vs Autism http://www.differencebetween.net/science/health/difference-between-adhd-and-autism/#ixzz1mug0CM6N

A warm BIG family

I honestly don't remember this song (I remember the Nicolas Barre song though). Made me cry when I heard and read the lyrics to this beautiful song.

I'm so ever proud to be part of this big family. My girl feels happy to be in the school (sans the endless HWs).

As the girls all say , "Once an IJ girl; always an IJ girl@

Hold on to our Dreams
IJ Spirit burning bright
Fill this world with love and light
Light that shines for all to see
Love that sets our spirits free

IJ friendships through the years
Born of simple joys and tears
Something tells us deep inside
IJ friends are friends for life

Hold on to our dream of peace, don't stop believing
Our hearts and hands ever seeking, ever serving
Hold on to the sound of our friends all joyously singing
Our voices raised to the Lord our God above
Hold on to our dream

IJ Spirit burning bright
Fill our hearts with love and light
Light to see ourselves anew
Love begins with me and you

IJ voices ringing true
Reaching out and breaking through
Every heart will hear our call
Share our dream of peace for all

Hold on to our dream of peace, don't stop believing
Our hearts and hands ever seeking, ever serving
Hold on to the sound of our friends all joyously singing
Our voices raised to the Lord our God above
Hold on to our dream (x2)

Hold on to our dream
Hold fast to the IJ dream
Hold on to our dream