14th December 2023 (Thu)
What an eventful meal I had. On a rare weekday we went for mookata at lil’ one’s request. On the way back to the car in the drizzle, coz hubby had to hold the umbrella n sharing with lil’ one I took the heavier NTUC bags (2 bags. While they carried 1 lighter bag each), I tripped on some stand and fell. It wasn’t the simple trip and fall but trip and hobbled 2 steps + knock into the stools metal legs and fell full body down. It must have been an unglamorous scene of a fat lady sprawled on the floor and it sure was noisy too! Soon there were people gathered around trying to help me. Strangely, the staffs didn’t even bother to come and see what happened. I was just so giddy, first from the shock, second from the knock somewhere on my head too. For a moment I simply wondered where I was. Strangely at that everything-spiralled-out-of-control moment when I fell it did seem my life flashed before me.
Happened way too fast and I felt fresh pain and giddiness. I stood up using lil' one's arm after scolding her infront of strangers. Still carried the heavy bags in pain to the car. I was very frustrated with them to notice the contents in the bag.
Frustrated with them coz they were nowhere in sight when that hell of noise would have attracted anybody's attention. Lil' one came to me and asked me something like "aiyoh. why you fall?" or was it "aiyoh. how you fall?" I really can't remember what she said. I asked her to help me since she's there, where's the man? Damn! No bloody EQ to come and help is it? So char-tao that he dunno how to respond? Fuck lah! If the wife is going to drop off the cliff he would let me die is it? Natural response would be "Are you ok?" and then reach out hands to help. No.....l got none from my own family members. You say I heart pain or not? Give them all the love and concern for nothing. Next time I shall just love myself more than them. Useless people! The strangers probably thought I was alone but obviously I wasn't. TMD! Even my girl can respond with "what if I fall?" when I asked her to help me. I gathered enough energy to scold her. Which means I'm definitely better if I can scold people. In the car, I was so angry and scolded the two of them half the journey 两个都没有用。小的不懂事，大的懂事可是没有来帮忙没有用。真的是白疼你 Aricia. I didn’t raise her up to be a unhelpful person, I raised her with love and expected her to show love and concern. Just so so disappointed with her.
After scolding I continued rubbing my whole arm, it was painful everywhere. I then noticed that I had scrapped my knee as well! The pain felt on the left side of body including the pectoralis major area overpowered the 小儿科 scrapped knee.
I only knew the Dettol bottle broke when saw liquid in the plastic bag in the condo carpark. The baseboard in his boot was soaking wet and strong smell of Dettol there was some seepage in his boot. There was a strong smell of Dettol.
Now I begin to feel pain in my left elbow, left hand was also numb. The left side was in pain more, the heavier bags on the left added more weight thus the severity. I had the thought of what if I had a fractured bone somewhere and caused internal bleeding. Will I die in my sleep tonight?
Back at home because the pain is so recent, I simply couldn't remove my clothes to shower easily and fast. Had to do it so slowly; had to find ways to compensate my movements.
For the next few days, I continued to do things slowly. Arm was numb most time. I DIDN'T feel like me. Had morbid thoughts that I’ll die in my sleep etc.. heart beating fast, I just didn’t feel the same since the fall. Should I start writing my will just incase I never wake up the next day? I hope you don’t feel I’m exaggerating my fall but I know myself better, I know this fall is 不是那么简单的。
Cannot move hand up. 我的手不听话！I had to use my right hand to bring my left arm and hold onto the glass shower screen or the wall or the sink. Can’t hook/unhook my bra, can’t tie my hair (it was so messy and slanting to one side), can't wear my clothes coz it's painful to put my hands through the arm sleeves.
17th Dec (Sunday) #1 tuina [郭医师 + 推拿师 ？？先生]
Told hubby the pain is no joke, it’s not the usual fall I must have hurt myself somewhere. He brought me to this famous place in AMK. He was there when the physician said my injury is bad, which means I wasn't faking it at all. Say should I scold them more for being heartless on the day I fell? I couldn't even lift my left hand up, no...I can't even lift my arm parallel to the floor. He asked me to lift up to show him and my arm and hand was trembling as I was moving up slowly. Physician said there's inflammation on my shoulder which I thought is fat, even asked me how the heck I endured the pain for 4 days!! Then he looked again, touched my neck and said “your neck is also inflammed.” I think my pain threshold is superbly high man!
Tuina was painful and I was screaming in the room the whole time. It’s my first time doing tuina, I had no idea what to expect. Did the two of them hear my screams? Firstly the tuina massager came then later the physician came in and tuina. He put in so much strength and I was in a lot of pain.
After first tuina felt better, can move but still in pain.
19th Dec (Tuesday) Second tuina - contortionist.
Probably the last tuina before my holiday, and until ?? To my next tuina.
Was made to lie face down on the bed in a weird position at some point for the tuina guy to get the points. Weird position like my head turn to opposite side, then he lift up my left arm so roughly and placed the forearm in a different angle from the limb. I felt like a contortionist today! What made it worst is he had to prop a pillow up and made me lie face down. We still had to wear mask and …. whether we need to wear mask or not, common sense is we need space to breathe. I think even before I die in my sleep, I die in their clinic. Is that how helpless a person felt when they’re smothered to death with a pillow? I was like that + the pain from tuina … 我不要活了!!
Yah, now I recall it must be 推拿师梁先生. I brought down my mask to my mouth to breath and he keeps scolding me to keep my mask on. “what if inspectors happen to come in and check etc…” He’s the only one who is fierce.
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TAIWAN HOLIDAY and a hiatus from the consultations
Sleeping on hard beds was a torture during holiday. Not only was I putting a strain on the ‘still not to 1/2 recovery’ shoulder area where the hard bed offered no comfort. My back and right side were painful. Only last 2 hotels bed were softer.
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THE YEAR 2024
AFTER HOLIDAY : Today’s the 12th and I start to feel the pain again. Sigh….. 真的老了不能跌倒
19th Jan 2024 - 10am #3 [洪医师 + 推拿师梁先生]
Che-che followed me coz I had to bring her to see doctor to get medication for her cold. There’s a clinic next to mine.
3rd tuina - cheche with me but she didn’t hear my complaints in the room as she had her AirPod stuck in ear.
Strange - when massage right shoulder blade, I had a headache. Felt the same on 4th tuina. I think he touched the 神经线. No wonder I’m crazy.
3rd n 4th tuina Same guy who kept saying he’s already very qing.
Acupuncture- 7 needles bottom, 3 at neck. Like twirl twirl.
Asked how I felt, I said I regret followed by painful
Bought this. Hope I remember to eat them.
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29th Jan (Monday)
Played organ, hand tired easily and stopped playing my Ghibli songs.
30th Jan 2024 (Tuesday) - #4 Tuina + 1st acupuncture （郭医师 + 推拿师梁先生） $161.42 before discount
Left arm still not completely healed. Was I expecting a miracle? Yes I am coz 老娘 don’t print money.
Persuaded me to do acupuncture 针灸 and I did. My goodness! I really regretted doing acupuncture the moment he put one needle in, and how many did he say he was going to put? I asked him if he can put somewhere to numb my whole body?
But actually felt so much better. He korek korek the waist area with needles. I don’t know how many needles he put but oh man…I imagine myself looking like a porcupine. My goodness! I thought my pui bak (fatty meat) won’t feel anything but 我的天啊. 可能不是算很肥 😂、还是他用大针?! Says he had to acupuncture the bottom (waist area), when he does that means all the Qi comes out, health problems come out. Says I have (1) too much stress and (2) I often carry too heavy things - which is true. I have to go often.
Me thinking rich people won’t get this problem; poor people will. Why? To alleviate the stress, k honestly there can be stress in many ways. (1) I DO HAVE ALOT OF STRESS not from kids academics but in other areas - family health; my health; kids; money. So please I don’t want any other undue stress from other stupiak things. I’m not saying rich people are stress-free (actually if they are always so free to drink kopi; go high-tea; go shopping they ARE stress free). Rich people may have some form of stress, those that they can’t designate someone else to do the job to lessen their stress. They pay money lor! Sure got people to help lessen their stress in some small ways. (2) Carry heavy things - I’m the slave at home, tell me when will I not carry heavy things? Tho’ it’s not everyday I’m a coolie carrying heavy things but somehow I will carry heavy things lor! Go supermarket too! Unless I have a domestic helper to help me with housework, I can 翘脚 and do nothing. I don’t order grocery online coz of a few reasons. End of the day we also bear the weight of poverty. How many times have I slumped my tired body on the massage chair while the guy did a back and shoulder massage for me? Many times. Many times too they keep saying 很硬 when they touch the muscles tension.
7th Feb
Second time I played the organ after my fall and both times I couldn’t play long. My arm was feeling tired and a little sore halfway through one song. Fingers felt a slight tingling sensation of numbness. In total I only played 3 songs (a little better than the first time where I only played 2 songs) and then surrendered 🏳️. I used to be able to play for an hour or more.
Today, as I did the accentuated finale to end this exciting Ghibli song, I let out a “ouch ouch ouch ouch” matching all the quavers as I pressed the keys hard putting so much energy on my arm muscles. One can say just play normally and no need to exaggerate hand movements too much, but coz electone organ keys are touch sensitive and I was so feeling INTO the music that I … 🎹
8th Feb (Thu)
Fight-Do punches are quick as we follow to the upbeat song.
Jab, cross, hook and few others requires the arm to be parallel to the ground while one attacks the opponent. I do have problem lifting my arm so I go slow. Each type of punch — whether a jab, cross, hook, or uppercut — is a precise movement that incorporates more than just your arms.
Thankfully I have an understanding trainer.
28th March (Thursday) 2pm - #5 Tuina (郭医师 + 推拿师姜先生）$106.80
The pain is getting more unbearable and have been getting numbing sensation in my arm and hand. I think I need to get a squeezeball. I had to skip my FightDo class and go to the clinic.
Said my injury is really bad. Yah, you don’t have to keep reminding me. Sigh….
Tuina everytime I have to “aiyoh mummy mummy” but felt so giddy and pukish after the tuina. I think my lunch 2hrs before was still in my stomach 😅. Guy did the guasha for me using the bamboo stick or whisk
2nd April (Tuesday) 12pm - #6 Tuina (洪医师 + 推拿师王先生）[topped $500] $106.80
Different doctor, he said he saw me before. But this time he mentioned that my shoulder is also frozen as I under-utilise the hand in order not to aggravate the pain. Wanted to do acupuncture for me. Asked him painful or not, said not pain only one needle in the feet will be very painful 😰 dowan dowan. I told him it was so painful last time, then he asked 郭医师？… that conversation was so awkward as if he was badmouthing the expertise of the other doctor. Makes me wonder if my trips all these while was seen by the other doctor, does it mean it was pointless and money spent wrongly?
Tuina technique is slightly different, but I was making more noise today. 我真的怕痛. Most of the times, I think I like make the most noise lor! Lots of “妈咪啊！” From pain to laughing in pain, 王先生 asked me if I was laughing or in pain. 🤣
Doctor said I have to exercise to move my left hand but I explain the ones that I do makes my arm sore and I can’t lift up without feeling soreness. Plus fighting stances are fast I can’t do it so what exercise can I do? He taught me how to exercise my left arm daily. The other doctor 郭医师 never teach me. Hmm…..they both look young.
Wah….can TCM doctor speak English or not? I only understand 70% of what he said. Okay lah! 70% is considered A2. I scored C5 for my O’ levels so this A2 已经算不错了。
Doctor always say cannot 吹 aircon, cannot drink cold water. Otherwise now after tuina they open up pores then I drink cold water, it will make it worst and can’t recover. Hmm…..is that why after #5 still not working? But I hate to drink warm water, weather is hot I always need something cold to cool down. And I still don’t get the point on why cannot drink herbal drink.
Mom would hv told me “I told you so!” If I had brought up to her the topic abt drinking hot water. To avoid anymore nagging and scolding from her, I shall just keep quiet.
Told me to put a hot water warmer on my shoulder blade n my hand. Now makes me want to buy those herbal packs.
During the consultation, he saw my right hand knuckles darker colour. I mentioned my knuckles are painful, maybe I’ve been using too much of my right hand. Doc said it’s blood pain - cannot touch water. What?! WTH is blood pain? Or maybe C5 阿嫂 heard wrongly. Can give me a proper letter of excuse so I show hubby and the kids for exemption from housework and cooking and chauffeuring from now on? Both hands deemed useless. 😂
So I be a good girl and try drink warm water for the next few days.
5th April (Friday) 10am - #7 Tuina (郭医师 + 推拿师王先生）$32.22 for herb
Doctor again asked if I want to do acupuncture, recovery will be much faster. But I’m really scared, it’s really painful.
He goes on to yak yak yak about the Meridien point and what the heck? Can speak in English or not? Or let me write down so I can check on internet. (Actually I was quite interested in Tuina when the girls were younger. Yu Guo had lessons, but all in Chinese)
Tuina today is manageable. No more calling mummy but a few times koel call. I joked with the guy 我七早八早一直啊呕啊呕好像那只鸟. Poor guy exhausted as he is using all his gongfu on me and quite breathless each time, had to stop everytime he needs to laugh at my stupid jokes. I think I made him even more breathless with my jokes. I hope he knows what bird (噪鹃) I was talking about
Left the place with pain and it’s still painful days after. Now thinking tomorrow I go again, he aggravate the pain. So decided to go next week, I don’t want to spend my weekend being a handicap person.
9th April (Tuesday) 2pm - #8 Tuina (郭医师 + 推拿师姜先生）
Tuina is manageable. No 妈咪 and koel sound from me. Only painful when doctor did for me the “touch ups” tuina.
Did the guasha for me, so now arm n back look like I’m battered.
Doc mentioned about waist tuina - too much of XXX (什么来的、我听不懂）it caused the whole problem. What the cause - stress, burden. “扛了太重太多” makes me wonder if hubby is much better off than me or same or worst off?
Asked if I wanted to try so I did. PAINFUL! REGRET! 我后悔！
Doctor said something in Chinese about only talented people are capable of doing many things. 只有有才华的人才能做很多事情. 嗯不要这样咯！我 paiseh 鼓掌鼓掌！ 谢谢哦！ 😏 什么才华？最笨的有可能吧！must learn to teh….teh the husband pretend act helpless. But I cannot leh… I’m not that stupid either to not know do some things right? Later marry wrong man who don’t dote on me end up scolding I dumb how?
Today’s tuina is more ex coz of the 腰部 targetted treatment. And it’s the longest time I spent there - 2.5hrs!
Now back at home arm pain, right fingers (forefinger, middle 🖕 and ring finger) pain, back pain. Have to lie flat on my back instead of lying on my right side. Sigh…. Won’t do it again coz I feel more handicap. Hot water helped relieve pain for a while. 郭医师我永远记得你😤!
Conclusion : must be rich to be able to take care of yourself. Either rich to afford tuina n massage on a x3 weekly or weekly basis. Or rich to hire a helper to do everything in the house for you.
My goodness, over the last few days some TikTok videos play on FB about ppl falling. My heart squirm the moment I saw it. If I were to fall again, what should I do? Use the other hand to support me? And risk having both arms with problem. OR …. let myself fall on same side.
The thing I ordered from Taobao arrived. The stupiak rotating thing for laundry. Ordered it hoping I can stop rely on handwashing the floor mats. I don’t have the strength to scrub the mats with my left hand. Darn useless item!
14th 15th April - back in pain. Can’t sit; can’t lie down. Had problem getting up from bed. Too long didn’t go tuina? Last Friday raining I only found comfort in standing. Am I suppose to stand and sleep? Last few days drinking barley and cold drink, was that partially the cause for the pain everywhere too?
16th Apr (Tuesday) 12.55pm - #9 Tuina (郭医师 + 推拿师王先生 [only left $90+ after today’s deduction so topped $1000. My goodness! $2k in total and slight improvements only]
Asked doc why the pain after the tuina. Trying to imply that if I didn’t do the lower back massage last week I wouldn’t be feeling so much in pain now. It's like I 自找麻烦。 Could it be one of the signs for perimenopause??
I feel this guy is more 出力 than 姜先生. He keeps saying he’s only using 20% strength. My god! I was screaming more today than last week. Had to stop him a few times for me to break a while before he continue. He kept saying he cannot stop but I meant stop for me to endure the pain. While doing the herbal heat pack, heard him gossiping about me outside screaming pain when he hardly did anything, when he was only at the beginning. Haha! 我怕痛啦！anyway, sure or nor? He bluff me 20%, he was panting away already at 1/5 the strength. If he gave it all 他不是没的呼吸. He did the guasha for me as well.
Usually after the herbal heat pack has cooled, the physician will came back and said he didn’t have to tui for me anymore. “Pass already”, so now I finally understood why he normally comes in and 推拿 some more. Meaning no one did as good job as 王先生.
When 王先生 did the lower back 腰部 tuina, he also did the legs and he commented that my legs and feet are cold. ''Drink too much cooling things already.'' Wah! so clever that he can feel it. My goodness could that be the cause of severe pain? I’ve been drinking barley n chinchow drink for past few days.
Can’t sit for long. Can’t lie for long,- need to exercise my neck more often, my back pain from tuina mainly at BL-23 to BL-25 region
After the hot bottle on my back I want to get up from bed also cannot. Only 48 and I feel like an old lady. Why can’t I be like pandas 🐼? Can fall so many times and no dai-ji.
18th April (Thursday)
Thanks to an understanding Dawn, I'm able to pace myself during the class. So if I can, I'll usually just do lesser number of jab or cross on my left hand. For eg. instead of 3 jab/cross, I'll only do one. And usually it's assisted with my right hand, or I support my shoulder muscle. I still need to adjust my body to reach either front or back when using left hand. Now I feel my exercise no balance leh…
19th April (Friday) 10.40am - Tuina #10 郭医师 + 推拿师梁先生
No time for lower back massage as lil’ one ends school early at 12pm
No back massage. This tuina guy always put one in weird position as if to murder me. Prop up pillow and I had to put chin at the end of pillow while he did the tuina. Dunno the ache came from the left shoulder or from straining to keep my head in a straight position, otherwise every push he makes I’m going to whack my head on the bed. I had to stop him a few times to release the tension from being stuck in that position while he 出力地推拿 . Was told that Wang (Malaysian) is a temp staff deployed here.
When 郭医师 came in to check, he just had to 推拿 abit more then I declared “可以了。及格😂。” coz I didn’t want him to continue. He did a little more and then it’s done.
23rd Apr (Tues) - Tuina #11 郭医师 + 推拿师姜先生
Physician came by later to check and then said 我现在有空 so he can 推 some more for me but I replied 可是我很忙，我有事情做。while waiting to collect medication, I asked physician if I can do my planks. “哎哟！你的手还没全康复、千千万万不能做啦！”
My goodness! lil’ one called me since 2.15pm till 2.44pm which I didn’t know as phone is always on silent mode. I hate it everytime I get called up for chauffeuring duties at last minute. After tuina thought I could have my lunch at Eastpoint, pack dinner + groceries for tmrw’s cooking. At 2.45pm, I saw that lil’ one has been calling me for the last 1/2hr. Wasn’t feeling well, and asked to go home. My goodness! If she had spent that half hour calling me + by the time I had to get to here from other part of Singapore she could have gone home herself by getting Grab.
There goes my lunch! I was still looking forward to a Thai meal at Sanook Kitchen.
$109.60 it’s so much better when I don’t have to do the lower back treatment
Picked her up and sent her to the clinic opposite our house. Initially wanted to park in our home and walk over but the weather was too too hot. I dropped her first while I went to park the car. Then thought since I made her see the doctor on her own on Friday, I shall let her see the doctor by herself again today. Was too too hungry and had kuaychap while she saw the doctor.
26th April (Friday)
Wanted to go down after doing housework (clinic opens at 10am, she ends at 1pm) I think I will have enough time. Then she messaged me that she’ll end school at 12pm. How to go? See lah! I forgo my own health just for her. I also have this chao-kuan pattern that once I reach home I wouldn’t even want to step out again.
30th Apr (Tues) - tuina #12 (洪医师 + 推拿师梁先生)
Physician said it’s a huge improvement from the last time he saw me (2nd April) I felt the same too, just that sometimes I turn to reach for things behind me and it’s still painful.
He said he hardly sees me but I told him I’m usually here Tue n Fri (if I can) asked him when he’s here he said it depends. Maybe he’s not the permanent doc here. This physician younger and more handsome, got the Korean pop idol look.
He asked me if I drink cold drinks, I told him I’m very guai already have been drinking warm water. He very happy. Haha!
推拿师梁先生 - again received scolding from him. He very serious one leh. I also dare not joke with him, the moment I said it’s painful he like deliberately rub harder. Always panting away maybe coz they still need to wear mask. Heng this time he didn’t smoother me to death with a pillow, but still put my arm in awkward position. Made me use my right hand to hold left hand elbow, then left hand grip my right shoulder. He rub so hard until at some point my hand just gets lower and lower n he scolded me.
Lying face down, he used his arm to rub somewhere near my neck, and his fingers keep punching my cheek so I move my head away and he scolded me. 我感觉我被他推拿也被骂。I pay money to get scolded? *pout lips*
Physician checked again and rubbed a little more. I asked him what happens if next time I fall, should I fall on the same side or tilt body to right? He found it funny and asked I still have time to align and move my body? Yah! He has a point. That’s why he’s a doctor and I’m not. He asked me won’t I aggravate and make it more serious? I told him better to have both left and right injured right?
No waste time I was able to leave with no delay and went ahead with trip to FEF.
My flowers - tulips and peonies
8th May (Wed) - tuina #13 (洪医师 + 推拿师姜先生)
Handsome physician kept asking me to do acupuncture, citing that I should really consider it as it’ll help in a faster recovery. No thanks! Told him coz it was so painful last time that I sit also cannot; lie down also cannot. When I got out of bed, I practically had to roll myself to the edge and with handicap on lower back; left hand; right knee it was really slow and painful process. A simple task yet it’s not for me. 洪医师 told me he will acupuncture “脚下面” huh? Later pain until I cannot walk how? Or worst can’t step the accelerator or brake pedal.
But it’s certainly better, wah lau eh..I spend so much already if don’t get better 不是惨. I can finally hook my bra the usual way. But must be quick, if hold too long my left arm will feel the pain too. There are days when I had to hook it in the front and turn the bra over… still it’s a great improvement.
I don’t have any more time to go the rest of the days before the trip , so will only resume when I’m back. Flying off on 14th May so this will be my last tuina.
Curiosity made me wanna be a faux sinseh 🤣, checked out exactly what was the treatment he mentioned
9th May (Thursday)
Definitely so much better during Fight-Do. Still a challenge to do all the quick jabs or crosses if music is fast. Feel the pain still some times, at least the pain is endurable. Even when I make an “ouch”sound in class nobody can hear me as the music is loud 😜. When I feel the pain, I leave my left arm limped down. Many times I laughed at self in the mirror with my very ah-gua punches. Four arm movements which I still can’t do it - hook, hit the chin with elbow, descending, back fist (?) as long as need to lift arms horizontal or higher than horizontal it poses a challenge.
Floorwork was leg raise, easy peasy something which I always do when the rests are doing planks. But today’s floor work we had to use our elbow to support our top body which is away from the floor. Can handle on my right, when I switched side to my left I decided to just lie flat with my left arm squashed with my heavy body weight. Can’t endure that long, the arm felt painful 还是不可以. I haven’t slept on my left side (my usual and preferred side) since the fall. I switched back to the right to continue with the leg exercises.
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