Another frustrating morning

I dun understand, is it me or what? My little brat has made me so angry again. I seem to get so easily aggitated.

This morning my girl refused to let me wear her school uniform and was throwing a tantrum. Refused to let me do the inhaler on her and give her her cough medicine. Already I am late for my 9.20am class and there she is trying to delay time. I got so angry that I gave her a hard smack on her thigh. It turned red... it was that hard.

It seems like I'm a child abuser. I don't know but it seems that my girl likes to taunt me. And being impatient I will nag at her. She will be so stubborn to taunt me further which warrants a scolding or a beating or both.

Hubby seems to say " you always beat her." That's because I'm the only person attending to her everyday 24hrs, 60 seconds of course I'll get so edgy.

But he does not know that girl will tend to behave herself when he is not around. Perhaps she was trying to attract his attention by doing silly things.

Yesterday morning, I was also mad at her. That.. I left her alone in the house while I close the wooden door and stand outside. She was crying really loud and from her cries, can sense it's the fearful cry..... but I needed a time out too! 3 minutes later I opened the unlocked door and she let me feed her her milk. See! I used the soft approach on her and it din work, must use this cruel hard approach.